November, December, and The Wrap-Up

**Summer Knight: The Dresden Files, Book 4 by Jim Butcher (60) 11/3

Pick:
STILL trying to fill the time between finishing the last book and the arrival of my beloved Wheel of Time. Also enjoying Dresden immensely, so this made me put aside my Vine book for now in favor of Harry.

Story:
I had forgotten that this one began with Harry mired deep in depression, obsessed with saving Susan from her vampire curse. It irritated me that he blamed himself: she snuck into the party, dude. After you told her it was too dangerous and she shouldn't come. Her sneaking in was what got her into trouble, and that was a direct result of her mania for getting the scoop. Anyway, I did remember the ghoul assassin in the park, and it's a cool idea, but mine's better.

I like this one much more than the last; I like the parts about the White Council, I like the mystery of Mab and her decision to hire Harry, I love that Harry finally sits down (in Wal-Mart -- heh) and tells Murphy about everything. The Faerie monsters are great, and the final fight scene is wonderful, especially the way Harry finally beats the Faerie Queen over the Stone Table.

Thoughts:
I think this one is where Butcher hit his stride with Harry. In the overall story arc, this is when Harry hits his low point and then starts building up from here -- the war with the Red Court and his own culpability (and power, which is amply demonstrated by his ability to, well, save the world), and how he shoulders the burden of the war and attempts to do the same for Susan, this all adds up to Harry moving towards becoming a power player. I think the next big step for him is the Knights -- and I think that's the next one. Can't wait. Oh, but what is this that has come in the mail . . .

**The Gathering Storm: Book Twelve of the Wheel of Time by Robert Jordan and Brandon Sanderson (61) 11/11

Pick:
Yeah. I gotta explain why I picked this book. It exists, that's why. I didn't think it ever would, three years ago. Now it's here.

Story:
The first couple of pages were clearly not Jordan's writing -- Sanderson has a much leaner, choppier style, short sentences and abrupt paragraph breaks, with fewer details than Jordan lavished onto everything -- but by the time I finished the prologue and got to the actual story (the first chapter of which, I think, is Jordan's writing, at least the classic beginning paragraph and the few pages after that), I was already hooked.

Brandon Sanderson made the decision not to try to imitate Robert Jordan's style, and that was the right decision; the book worked much better this way than it would have if the reader had been forced to parse every paragraph, trying to decide how true it rang, looking hard for the false notes. As it was, once I had my moment of sorrow for the loss of a great wordsmith, I was able to throw myself into the story without any thought for the writing, with only one small annoyance -- Sanderson jumped storylines with nearly every chapter, where Jordan would have stayed with one point-of-view character for two to three chapters or even more, and Sanderson's chapters are a third of the length Jordan's were, so I was constantly pining for more about the one we just left when we moved on to the next. But the storylines were fantastic. All the characters were there, and more was revealed in this book than any other one -- which I think is a result of the looming approach of the climax and end of the series, rather than an artistic difference between the two authors.

I was very pleased that it focused on my two favorite story lines and characters (at least my two favorites of the last few books -- favorites change several times over a series this long), Rand and Egwene. Egwene's struggle with the White Tower was simply epic, building on the groundwork laid in Knife of Dreams and coming to a head in the Seanchan assault on the Tower which proved Egwene's ability in every possible way, and won her the Seat without equivocation. I love what happened to Elaida, as well -- most fitting, most satisfying. I was a bit saddened to watch Tuon return to her roots, because I can't stand the Seanchan and I hate to think of her as one of them and therefore incapable of being a partner to Mat, who loves Tuon; but this book certainly set her up as a bad guy. I'm now incredibly curious how Rand will be dealing with that little problem in the next book.

And Rand. Ah, Rand, you little idiot. The decision to harden himself, to make himself proof against all emotion, is finalized in this book, and the results are -- predictable. There is an impossibly hard-to-read scene, when Rand is forced by one of the Forsaken to do the worst thing imaginable, and the result of that is most surprising. And then every scene after that shows Rand's descent into seemingly irretrievable madness, which had me wondering: what if the Last Battle is not what we have thought? There are hints in this book that it won't be, that the Dark One's wishes are not what everyone expects them to be, and after watching Rand turn more and more despotic and even savage, I thought: what if the Dark One's only goal has been to drive Rand to this? What if the Last Battle is simply over Rand's allegiance, the soul of the Dragon Reborn? If that's the case, then evil comes perilously close to winning in this book. And the ending -- the ending actually made me choke up. First time I've cried over a book since Where the Red Fern Grows.

Thoughts:
Robert Jordan died, but the Wheel of Time turns, spinning memory into legend, and legend into myth. His death was not the ending; there are no beginnings or endings to the turning of the Wheel of Time, but it was an ending. This book is not completely his book, and that is a loss because he was a better writer than Sanderson. But the book is still my book, as a reader; it is my story, these are my characters, it is the next step towards the completion of my favorite story of all time. I'm so very glad it exists, and I got to read it. And now I can't wait for the next one.

So a moment of silence for Robert Jordan, and three cheers for Brandon Sanderson (and Harriet Jacobs).


**The Unscratchables by Cornelius Kane (62) 11/14

Pick:
Vine Voice; this is one of the first ones I selected for the program, but it got lost in the mail and then brought to our door by the neighbor who received it (and might have read it, since the package was open, but what the hell -- I'm all for reading, even if it is pirate reading, and the book was in fine condition). By then the review was already three months late, so Toni and I decided to use it as one of our cooking storybooks, which I read aloud to her as she makes dinner.

Vine Review:
"The Unscratchables" is a satire of hard-boiled detective novels, with dogs and cats instead of human characters, and so it has exactly what one would expect: the author does quite a lot of playing around with cliches and standard motifs for the genre, keeping true to some and changing others to fit the unusual main characters; there are a tremendous lot of puns and pop culture references, everything from boxing promoter Don King to Hannibal Lecter from "Silence of the Lambs;" and the narrative voice is over the top, so hard boiled that you can't help reading in an angry growl. But what's surprising about the book is that there are also some fascinating and original ideas. The author has not simply replaced human characters with animals; the animals stay true to their natures, at the same time that they are acting like Sam Spade or Special Agent Pendergast.

The main character, Detective Max "Crusher" McNash of the San Bernardo Slaughter Unit, is nicely done: we explore enough of his past to understand just why he hates cats so much, but we don't dwell in the past so much that we lose track of the storyline. The focus in the book is definitely on the mystery: the slashing deaths of several dogs, apparently by some outrageously powerful and quick feline. This means that Crusher has to work with a partner, and not just any partner: he has to work with an agent from the Feline Bureau of Investigation, come straight over from Kathattan, a slick little Siamese named Cassius Lap. The problem is that Crusher fought in the war against the Siamese, and he may not be able to keep himself from giving Lap a death shake, let alone working alongside him.

Cassius Lap is also an excellent character, though the author took advantage of Lap's professionalism to downplay his animal tendencies; apart from a fear of water and a liking for soy milk (Lap is sadly lactose intolerant), Lap comes off simply as a dedicated and intelligent investigator. Most of the animal references are kept within Crusher's narrative voice, his thoughts and language are the most non-human parts of the book, often delightfully so -- I definitely enjoyed Crusher's description of driving in his "tooter (car)," with his head out the window because his windshield was cracked. But Lap's presence keeps the book focused on a genuine mystery, the solution of which played out quite nicely by the end. I especially liked the author's sociological thoughts, descriptions of the Mighty Lamb of societal pressure that has come to dominate its would-be shepherds, voiced through a particularly interesting character -- Quentin Riossitti. That one I'm going to leave for the book to explain. I highly recommend looking into it.

Thoughts:
It was a lot of fun to read, but maybe a bit too complicated for an out-loud story. Probably should stick to the YA stuff for that.


**V for Vendetta by Alan Moore and David Lloyd (63) 11/17

Pick:
I had put a picture of V on my ID tag for school on the Fifth, and still had it on a week later during parent conferences (And still have it on a week after that). While eating lunch with some of my colleagues, one of them noted it and asked if I had ever read the original graphic novel. I said no, I kept meaning to buy it but never had, and she offered to lend it to me, an offer I jumped on. Even though I should be reading my own shelf full of books, I couldn't turn down a chance at V.

Story:
I'm very glad I read it. It does change some things from the film, though the film stayed largely true to it, merely changing some things about the particular characters -- not V, of course, though he's a lot funnier and therefore more disturbing in the book. Evey is younger (she's 16 when it starts, about 18 when it ends), and there are different bad guys, including a particularly atrocious woman, power-hungry and cruel and completely manipulative. The art was wonderful, and one of the especially nice things about this comic is that there are no sound effects, no thought bubbles, and almost no narration at all -- everything happens in the action and dialogue. It's impressive work, and has an even stronger message about non-conformity and anarchy than did the film. I loved it.

Thoughts:
I definitely need my own copy of this.


**Queene of Light by Jennifer Armintrout (64) 11/21

Pick:
Vine Voice, picked it because I want to lean towards fantasy and paranormal stuff and Toni liked one of this woman's other books.

Vine Review:
I expect there are a number of people who loved this book, and many more who would love it were they to read it. I was not one of them. There are some clever ideas here, but for the most part, the setting is overdone and needlessly complex, but not sufficiently explained or described -- presumably to keep the book shorter and quicker, more within the realm of paranormal thriller than epic fantasy -- and the plot is weak. It seems that the purpose of this book is mainly to set up the next two, one of which has already been released by the time I'm writing this, with the other due to be released in two days; perhaps those novels will be superior. This one was not.

A few specifics: the idea of Lightworld and Darkworld is fine, normal Faerie novel fare, but in this case, neither the people of the Lightworld -- Faeries, Dragons, and Dwarves, though the Dwarves do not appear in this book -- nor the people of the Darkworld -- Elves, Gypsies, and rather inexplicably, vampires and werewolves, and even more inexplicably, Christian-based demons and angels(?) -- have ever seen the light. They all live underground, having been banished from the surface world by humans -- after they were all banished from their extradimensional homes by the destruction of the astral plane. That last part is clever, but there seems no reason at all to add the underground elements, other than it serves to make the setting that much darker, since now there can be a complete lack of sunlight and several descriptions of foul, brackish waste water. The Queene of the Faerie (Why, oh why, do authors feel the need to add an "e" to words that have no need of it?), Mabb (of course), is impossible to believe: she is insane and decadent and apparently incapable of and uninterested in ruling, and yet she has the absolute, unwavering loyalty of her subjects: the comment is made that the line of supplicants who wait for an audience with her are willing to wait until their deaths, and then have their children -- conceived and birthed and raised while waiting outside Mabb's palace -- wait as well. Yet Mabb never sees them. So this begs the question: what could they possibly want to ask the Queene about, that they are willing to die without an answer? None of the Faerie have consistent characters, despite some definitive statements about their inhuman ways. If anything, they were inhuman simply because they were more like cardboard cutouts than actual people: cardboard cutouts with odd shapes. I still can't fathom why Ayla, the main character, wants to help these people regain the surface world, or why the villain (an immortal Faerie) waited this long to put his plan into action. But the biggest unanswered question for me is this: why are the races, including Humans, all named with capital letters?

The most unfortunate part of the book is the romance, since it is one of those "I should hate you, but I can't understand why I am so drawn to you" sort, without explanation, without reason, and without much time spent on it before the main characters are pledging undying devotion. I have seen that sort of love done well, but only rarely -- and not in this case. The rest of the plot follows suit. This is a book that either should have been planned out at least twice as much as it was -- or put down before it made it this far.

Thoughts:
Wasn't terrible, but man, it wasn't good.


**The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Vol. I by Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neill (65) 11/25

Pick:
This one and the sequel were loaned to me by the same teacher friend who loaned me V. Which is why she rocks hard. Know it. Live it. I read it now because I'm curious, and I wanted to return the books to Page.

Story:
This was, surprisingly, something of a disappointment. It wasn't bad, because it was quite well-written, but the art wasn't nearly as interesting as V -- back to standard comic book tropes; if this O'Neill guy didn't draw the later issues of Amazing Spider-Man when I was reading it, he's at least blood brother to the guy that did. The story did have some neat twists and turns; I liked that Quatermain was an opium addict, and the bad guy was excellent, as was his final doom. But for the most part, it seemed pretty standard comic fare. The end piece, a longer narrative with fewer illustrations, was more interesting: Quatermain takes a psychotropic drug and his soul goes on an extra-dimensional adventure with John Carter from Edgar Rice Burroughs' Mars novels, his "nephew" (I think by dint of a name coincidence), a character from one of H.P. Lovecraft's Cthulhu stories, and the Time Traveller from H.G. Wells. That one was quite cool.

Thoughts:
Meh. I put this one in line with The Dark Knight: a good graphic novel, but not one of the masterworks of the genre. Less interesting than The Watchmen or Sandman or V for Vendetta.


**The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, Vol. II by Alan Moore and Kevin O'Neill (66) 11/29

Pick:
Same as the last; I was hoping this volume would get better.

Story:
It didn't. The concept was clever -- they brought in the Martian invaders from War of the Worlds, as well as Dr. Moreau -- but the story dragged very badly. The extraordinary gentlemen still didn't do anything particularly interesting, apart from Hyde and the Invisible Man, which was the best part of the story. Quatermain does nothing but have an extremely awkward and uncomfortable-to-read tryst with Mina Harker, who never does anything interesting in the entire run of the comic -- not once! Not a scrap of vampire power! Totally lame! -- and Nemo was fine, but couldn't really bring the Nautilus to bear on the aliens. The only good part was when the Invisible Man turned traitor and allied himself with the aliens, trying to help them conquer and become Earth's overlord; he gets found out by Mina, whose ass he kicks; and Hyde, who can see T.I.M.'s body heat, takes his horrible, bloody vengeance for Mina's suffering. That was cool, especially the end of it. The end story on this one was long and boring, so I left it out.

Thoughts:
Not even as good as the first one. This one's more on par with The Preacher: I wouldn't throw it out, but I probably wouldn't read it very often.


**Dragon Keeper by Robin Hobb (67) 12/5

Pick:
Vine choice. I had to grab it -- it's Robin Hobb. AND it's about dragons!

Review:
As a long-standing fan of Robin Hobb, I had to read this book; I'm glad I did.

I must admit to being behind on my Hobb; I still have two Tawny Man books to read, and I've never read the Soldier Son series, so there might be connections and correlations I missed in this book. But the important thing, I believe, is that I have read the Liveship Traders; this book takes up where those left off, after Bingtown won its war with Chalced, with the help of the dragon Tintaglia.

As always with Robin Hobb's books, the plot is too long and involved and interesting for me to try to recap it here. The best part of Hobb's books has always been her characters, and these are no different. It is fascinating to see the dragons, with their arrogance -- both reasonable and excessive -- from multiple points of view: both the dragons' own, and that of several humans who see them quite differently. Thymara wishes to be a friend to a dragon; Alise worships them; Sedric sees them as filthy and dangerous beasts. The dragons themselves, of course, see dragons as the greatest creatures who ever existed, the Lords of the Three Realms -- sky, sea, and land -- but that also hurts these dragons, as they know themselves to be somewhat less than dragons should be, a circumstance that is both poignant and inspiring. Let me note, as well, that these are probably the most interesting dragons I have ever seen in a fantasy book, both in complexity of character and in the imagining of their life cycle and biology.

I realized a trend with this book: Hobb seems to have a flair for creating cold-hearted, manipulative, deceitful, self-absorbed foppish villains. In the Farseer books it was Regal; in the Liveship Traders it was the Satrap of Jamaillia; in these books, it is Hest Finbok. (Another trend I have known about for a while with Hobb's books: she is terrible at coming up with character and place names. Alise and Thymara aren't bad, but Hest Finbok? Cedric with an "s?" A character with tattoos on his face -- named Tats? Yoinks.) Hest is, like Regal and the Satrap, wonderfully nasty, very easy to hate, and this gives sympathy to a character that could easily be a villain but isn't, whom Hest has, in some ways, corrupted. Alise is up and down as a character: she is annoyingly passive and naive some of the time, but that is exactly who her character is supposed to be, and the shell we hope she will break out of over the course of the books (This is the first of two, rather than Hobbs's usual trilogy.). Thymara is very well done, and the exploration of social interactions between the Dragon Keepers looks to be fascinating as it unfolds.

The book is a bit of a cliffhanger; it cuts off just about when the story really gets going. I would highly recommend that readers reserve judgment on the overall story until after reading the continuation; this book, while not boring, is much more about the characters and the setup, rather than the actual climax and resolution of the plot. This one certainly got me ready to read the second book, and find out what happens to all of these folks.

Especially the dragons.

Thoughts:
I liked it. I bet the black dragon who swoops out of nowhere to connect with Tintaglia and take her out of the story is actually Verity, and that is what happens in the Tawny Man books. Now I have to read those. And the Soldier Son books. And anything else she writes! Woo! Robin Hobb!


**The Big Book of Barry Ween, Boy Genius by Judd Winick (68) 12/9

Pick:
Even though we were only talking about Alan Moore, Page decided to throw this comic collection in there because she thought I'd like it. Told you she rocked hard.

Story:
Barry Ween surprised me. The concept of a boy genius world-conquering inventor is a bit of a cliche, what with Stewy Griffin and Pinky and the Brain, but Barry gives a whole different view of that experience: he doesn't like his brain, or his life, and while he certainly has the capacity to take over the world, and has built the inventions to do it, he doesn't want to.

Then you have another cliche: Barry makes use of the usual comic juxtaposition of a dirty old man in a child's body. He and his best friend, Jeremy, have outrageously filthy mouths, and Jeremy has an unholy obsession with sex and pornography, which Barry feeds. And yet there is quite a sweet story of young love developing here -- without ever crossing the line into actual romance, since these are ten-year-old kids, a 350 IQ notwithstanding.

The art is cartoonish, but very nicely executed; Judd Winick has a flair for facial expression, particularly in moments when the usually cantankerous Barry softens and smiles gently at his friends. The action panels could be overly busy sometimes -- it was hard to find Barry in some of his epic combats -- but the writing more than made up for it. The writing is hilarious, the stories nicely absurd, the characters consistent and many-layered; even the profanity was sometimes original and amusing. All in all, this was an excellent book, with a remarkably poignant ending page, followed by a short full-color episode that made a very satisfying closer. I hope there will be more Barry Ween in the future -- I'd love to keep reading it.

Thoughts:
This rocked; I might just buy my own copy.


17. The Darkness That Comes Before by R. Scott Bakker (Unfinished)

So this is the one that's been haunting me the longest, because four years ago, David Schmor gave it to me and asked me to read it and offer my opinion. I wasn't terribly interested in it then, since I have learned that fantasy is a very chancy genre for picking up new authors and stories, but I was game, and I said I would. And then it sat on the shelf, in its black-on-black-with-black-writing dust jacket, and its doomerrific subtitle (Prince of Nothing, Book One), and its massive tome-like size, and it intimidated me, and gloomed me, and warned me off in every way a book can. And I played along, and avoided reading it.

Until now. I read the first fifty pages, hit the most purple, overwrought, tortured prose I've read since Kushiel's Dart, the most annoying and over-complicated world building since Glen Cook's Instrumentalities of the Night, and the worst names since, well, the Robin Hobb book I read last week. Anasurimbor Celmcas? Really? With an accent over the i? That seems excessive. Just a bit. When I realized that the book held Appendices -- yep, plural -- and that the character was poorly rendered in addition to being badly named and inhabiting a complicated place in a complicated world (this is all within the first fifty pages, mind), I just couldn't go on.

Another one off the shelf.


18. Drinking, Smoking and Screwing, edited by Sara Nickles (69 -- heh) 12/14

Pick:
Something short, simple, immediately interesting after the lump of bombast I just finished. I picked this up off the bargain shelf at Powell's, because I liked the title and the concept. Nice and curmudgeony.

Story:
I expected this to be essays and memoirs and ponderings; actually, it was largely excerpts from longer works, long short stories and novels, chosen because they were about one or more of the three title issues -- smoking, drinking, or sex. The bit from Lolita was well-written but disturbing; the Bukowski snippet was just like the novel I read -- well-written but disturbing. The thing from Spalding Grey was pointless and annoying. I definitely enjoyed the Dorothy Parker story, and I loved the things that looked more like essays -- the piece on the vocabulary of drinking (mainly where mixed drinks get their name -- cocktail, martini, Mickey Finn, etc,) by H.L. Mencken, the one called "How Not To Smoke And Drink Quite So Much," which made me want to start smoking again -- only not so much -- and the pieces by Fran Lebowitz and Mark Twain, on how to deal with annoying people when you are a smoker. Overall it was a nice, quick, amusing read.

Thoughts:
Not bad. Not a keeper. I might want to look for longer pieces by some of these people. I will want to get copies/keep this copy of the Lebowitz and the Twain.


**Death Masks: Book 5 of the Dresden Files by Jim Butcher (70) 12/16

Pick:
What, I need a reason to read Dresden now?

Story:
This one is one of my favorites. I love Susan's expanded character, I love both plot lines -- the Denarians and the Shroud of Turin, as well as Count Ortega and the Red Court's attempt to kill Harry and end the war. This book is the introduction of Waldo Butters, and of the Archive and Kincaid, and Shiro and Sanya and the Denarians and oh man, does it rock.

Thoughts:
I need to read the others for comparison, but: this is the best in the series so far. No question.


19. The Death of Common Sense: How Law Is Suffocating America by Phillip K. Howard (71) 12/19

Pick:
I got this one at a book sale, I don't remember which one though it was probably Scappoose library. I picked it up because I liked the title and the concept, but I've avoided reading it until now because it's a bit out of date, and I was afraid it was going to be hardcore Libertarianism, which I don't particularly like. But I wanted to read something quick before the end of school, since I'm running this reading challenge with my students over break, and I'm trying to knock down some of my Shelf. So I thought, what the heck. Worst case scenario is I put it down.

Story:
I didn't put it down. I almost want to read it again. This is a brilliant book, and one I really needed to read.

The basic concept is that we have allowed our common sense to slip away, in favor of laws. We got the idea that laws can handle every eventuality, if we just make them specific enough, and that once those laws are specific enough to take care of everything, then all will be well, as solutions to our problems will be taken out of the hands of untrustworthy human beings, with their flawed judgment and their biases and their tendency toward corruption.

I'm not sure how we missed the idea that the laws themselves would be made by those same fallible, biased, corrupt human beings, but there it is. I think it is because we trust the democratic process to keep any individual human from screwing up the laws, whereas we don't trust bureaucrats to actually make decisions -- especially not bureaucrats who were appointed, rather than elected.

The problem, of course, is that laws cannot predict every eventuality. The larger problem is our reaction to this initial problem, which I'm sure became obvious right away (this was a gradual process, of course, and there isn't one tipping point -- though the author glanced meaningfully at both FDR and LBJ), was to add more laws, with more specifics, in order to handle the situations we didn't think of before. But what ends up happening is that the more specific a law is, and the less leeway that is allowed to government officials to make decisions about individual cases, the more loopholes there are in the laws and the easier it is to get away with doing things completely counter to the intent of the law, but well within its letter. Like the tax laws, which allow rich fatcats to pay nothing at all, while I and my middle-class ilk shoulder the burden of paying for the United States. But we can fix that: how about some more laws?

Then there are other problems with our society. One is that government officials, freed from the burden of having to make decisions and then be responsible for those decisions -- because we don't want our government employees to make any decisions at all, since we don't trust them -- have become intentionally indecisive and dilatory, slowing down every government process in every way, and passing the buck whenever possible, so that no decisions ever get made, at all, because that way nobody will be held accountable for a decision. This has been exacerbated by our nation's decision to allow everyone and their mother to sue everyone else and their grandmother for any perceived slight at all: now not only will making a decision put you in danger of losing your comfortable government sinecure, but you just might get smacked with a lawsuit, as well. So nobody makes decisions, and nothing gets done. Issues and requests get sent from committee to committee to committee, where they eventually die of old age, while everything in our society just keeps on suckin'.

The last problem described in the book is probably the nearest and dearest to my teachin' heart. It is the idea that citizens in this country have the right to all services provided by our government, even if providing those services to every individual citizen means that the services themselves become useless, or are denied to other citizens because of the first set. Too confusing, I know. Take the Americans with Disabilities Act. Several examples were pulled out of this. Now, the idea behind it is all well and good; services should not be denied to someone only because of a disability. But there needs to be a certain caveat added to that sentence: when it is reasonable to provide those services to that person. And perhaps some inconvenience, such as a delay, should be expected.

But we refuse to accept that, because we believe we are entitled to all services -- and what's more, we are entitled to convenience in receiving those services. Thus lawsuit after lawsuit after lawsuit have ensured that every new building which grants access to the public has wheelchair ramps and elevators. Despite the simple fact that people in wheelchairs make up a miniscule portion of our population, and the installation of ramps and elevators and wheelchair-accessible hallways and doorways and restrooms costs an inordinate amount -- money that cannot then go towards providing services or amenities to the rest of us -- and is occasionally detrimental to other people -- such as old folks who have trouble going up ramps, who would be better served by staircases, especially in places that have ice in the winters.

You combine that entitlement, along with the government's unwillingness to make decisions and take responsibility for those decisions, AND our attempts to handle everything through universally applied laws that grow more and more infinitesimally specific -- and thus more gargantuan in written form -- every year, and you get: us. All fucked up and getting worse. Unable to pass universal health care because it is possible that someone, somewhere, could get fifty Federal cents put towards an abortion. Because there has to be codification of something as simple as an end-of-life consultation, which should just be done by a reasonable doctor, and paid for by a reasonable insurance auditor. Because we refuse to allow a government bureaucrat in between us and our doctors, since we don't trust those government people to make our medical decisions for us -- but we'll sure as hell let an insurance company bureaucrat do exactly that. Though of course, they won't be held accountable for their decisions. Because no one is.

And here we are. Without common sense, and dying off as a society because of it.

Happy book.

Thoughts:
The author's recommendation was that we start asking people to make decisions, and holding them accountable for those decisions. Makes sense to me. So I will continue to fail students, year after year after year, until the lazy bastards do their work. And if that ends up getting me, I don't know, chewed out or forced out, I will take responsibility for my decision, and I will do what I have to do. That will be my way of helping save our world.

Go me.



**Elantris by Brandon Sanderson (72) 12/23

Pick:
This one came from one of my students -- the one who reads the most, probably -- who is a fan of the Wheel of Time. He read this for his first book report for class, and we talked a little about it, so he loaned it to me along with another one over Christmas Break. I decided to read it now to make sure I got it done and could return his book (Though I didn't get through the other one yet, so he'll probably have to wait a little while, not that it matters.) and because the premise sounded interesting.

Story:
This book confirmed everything I thought about Brandon Sanderson based on Mistborn, which I read a while back to see how well I thought this guy would do with WoT: I decided then that Sanderson has some outstanding ideas, and is a decent but not a spectacular wordsmith. I was pleasantly surprised to see how well he did with Robert Jordan's characters and plot, but this one went back to Mistborn: it's a fantastic idea, with decent writing. Actually, since this one is Sanderson's first published novel, it isn't as well-written as Mistborn, though it isn't bad. A bit too long; there's a whole section that I thought could have been dropped entirely.

The idea is this: there is a city, called Elantris, peopled by demi-gods. The demi-gods were once human, and Elantris is surrounded by normal human towns, but every once in a while, a human will wake up and find that he has transformed overnight into an Elantrian: his skin and hair turn glowing silver-white, and he becomes nearly immortal and possessed of great magical power. The human goes to join his kind in Elantris, and they watch over the human people. Then, ten years ago, something happened: suddenly the magic of Elantris stopped working, overnight; the humans rioted as their benevolent overlords failed them, and most of the Elantrians were killed. Ever since then, whenever a human undergoes the change, he no longer becomes a god: now he becomes little more than a walking corpse, cursed instead of blessed. He is thrown into the now-rotting city of Elantris, and forgotten.

It's a nice premise, this idea that even gods could falter, and what would happen when they did so. It's actually built on another cool premise, which is that there are sigils, icons, that are the source of magic in this world; they are the magic the Elantrians had mastered, and which, it turns out, had failed them for a specific (only slightly cheesy) reason. I won't spoil it here, since these clever ideas are Sanderson's best attribute as a writer.

The characters are decent, though there is way too much time spent dealing with political intrigue, and especially with the slow realization of what is really going on. There is a point, maybe two-thirds through the book, when two characters decide to marry each other for political reasons, so they can have a legitimate claim on the throne of the country around Elantris. Stuff happens and they fail, but it takes a while for their plan to come to a head, and then fall apart -- and there is absolutely no reason for it to be in the book. It doesn't advance the plot at all, as at the end of this scheme, the characters are almost exactly where they were before this plan was hatched, and it takes up 100-150 pages of the nigh-700 page novel. Should have been dropped entirely, along with some of the more ponderous explorations of daily life in Elantris -- for instance, there are three gang leaders in Elantris. Why not just two? No reason, he just thought of three different ways the protagonist could overcome three gangs, so he threw all three of them in there.

But: I did like the ideas, I did like the bad guy (even if he was a poorly-disguised allegory for the Catholic Church, as the Mormon Sanderson worked out some personal issues through his characters), and I loved the ending -- except for what happens to the bad guy. Sorta lame. Could have been better. Pretty good book, though. I may try Sanderson's newest series, once I can buy new books freely, again.

Thoughts:
Already said 'em.


**The Doom Machine by Mark Teague (73) 12/26

Pick:
Amazon Vine. I dig YA, I dig sci-fi, I dig that this guy drew his own illustrations. I was curious about the Doom Machine.

Review:
When I first started this book, I was dubious. The characters were cliche and quite flat -- the Huck Finn uneducated independent free spirit, repeated both in ten-year-old Jack and his middle-aged Uncle Bud; the surly prejudiced cop and his dumb bully of a son; the heartless rational scientist, softened not at all by being female. I thought the aliens were silly, and the few jokes in the beginning were not the greatest. Even the illustrations seemed a bit tired.

But I continued on, and when the story left Earth, the book took off with the spaceship. The aliens became multi-dimensional and interesting, the characters gained depth and spirit, the world of outer space was vast and interesting and real, without being overwhelming. The book became a mix of adventure story, political allegory, scientific exploration, and imaginative storytelling, and it really became wonderful. Even the illustrations became more intriguing, when the author/illustrator got into depicting the stranger places and beings his characters encountered.

Much of the book takes place on an alien planet called Arboria, with three human characters trekking across its harsh and strange landscapes in search of help; meanwhile, the alien spaceship flies toward its home planet with two scientists on board -- one who thinks of Earth's best interests, and one who thinks only of his own. The contrast keeps the reader interested, as does Teague's forays into the mindset of the aliens themselves; while they are often cliche villains, the view of the alien culture, particularly the inner conflicts that fracture the society, are especially interesting, and easy enough for a young adult reader to grasp.

The first few chapters are a bit dull and clunky, but the majority of the book is excellent and entertaining. It was definitely worth the effort to get into it.

Thoughts:
He really should have tried harder to think up good human characters; even the aspects that were interesting, like the young girl's mixed race heritage in the 1950's, were not explored, because too much time was spent on young Jack's adventures souping up cars and playin' hooky. Lame sauce. Really were good aliens, though. Great ending -- until they got back to Earth. Then it was lame again.


20. The Verse by the Side of the Road by Frank Rowsome, Jr. (74) 12/27

Pick:
There was no good reason for this book. It's the history of the Burma-Shave signs, the ones that used to spin out a brief poem in five or six lines along highways in the time of Bugs Bunny (which is the only place I'd ever seen them myself, since they ended the campaign and the company in the 60's), which is not particularly fascinating, and has no connection to me personally. But I got it at the Scappoose Library Sale, and I've been using it as a bathroom reader for much of this year. I wanted to finish it up, I wanted to pad my book total -- hey, I really read this thing, so why not? -- and I only had twenty pages of sign limericks left. So there you are.

Story:
Kind of nice that the company was a mom-and-pop who created their own product, and used poetry and wit to sell it, and became not only very successful, but also a cultural icon. For the generation before me, admittedly, since I tried to make a Burma-Shave reference on Facebook and fell flat on my face . . . book, but still: they did it with puns and doggerel and wordplay, and I've got to like that. It was a short, easy book to read, probably would be more interesting for someone who knew the signs in person, so to speak, which means I think it will head over to me pops.

Thoughts:
Here are some of the best (including one promoting highway safety, which was another cool thing about the company):

Does your husband
Misbehave
Grunt and grumble
Rant and rave?
Shoot the brute some
Burma-Shave.

The safest rule
No ifs or buts
Just drive
Like everyone else
Is nuts!
Burma-shave

Said Juliet
To Romeo
If you
Won't shave
Go homeo.
Burma-Shave

Drinking drivers --
Nothing worse.
They put
The quart
Before the hearse.
Burma-Shave


Good stuff.


**The Guinea Pig Diaries by A.J. Jacobs (75) 12/28

Pick:
Christmas present from Toni. (And for Toni.) Something non-fiction, short pieces, after a bit of a slog to get through Elantris? Perfect.

Story:
And you thought A.J. Jacobs could only do year-long experiments in alternative living. Hah! This book is nine month-long experiments, some that A.J. thought up in between reading the entire encyclopedia and living Biblically, and some that were suggested to him by readers or editors or family members. The experiments are: living as a beautiful woman, when A.J. created an online profile, screened the e-mails, and set up dates for his nanny Michelle; outsourcing his personal life to a pair of firms in India; a month of Extreme Honesty, when A.J. tried to tell everyone the absolute truth with no filtering at all; his experience impersonating an actor at the Oscars; an attempt to live life completely rationally, without any biases or unthinking prejudices; his nude photo shoot for Esquire magazine as part of a piece by Mary-Louise Parker (Yep, Weeds woman) on how it feels to be photographed in the nude; an attempt to live according to the personal rules of behavior endorsed by George Washington; a month spent doing only one thing at a time without any multi-tasking at all; and finally, a month doing whatever his wife Julie asked of him.

Thoughts:
The book is great. But since I already blogged about the best parts, I'm going to let it go at that.



21. I Hate Myself and Want to Die by Tom Reynolds (76) 12/28

Pick:
We found this one at Powell's while waiting in the checkout line, I believe; it was marked down and looked/sounded very amusing. I started reading it to her on the way home, and then put it down for probably a year; I picked it up again fairly recently and read it as a bathroom book -- a use to which it was well-suited -- and then decided to finish it up to, well, pad my total for the year. And also so I could be done with it and start something new.

Story:
So this book goes through the 52 most depressing songs ever made, as chosen by the author -- a music critic and musician from LA. His criteria for being a depressing song came down to these: first, is it about a depressing subject? Death, or drug use, or rejection, or loss? Secondly, does it wallow in that depressing theme until you just about want to kill yourself? Third, is it pretentious, either in its attempt to be overtly, shockingly depressing, or in its failed attempt to be grandiose and moving? If it matches all of those, then it made the list.

Reynolds divides the songs into several different categories, rather than offering one a week -- which seemed an odd choice, considering his list includes 52 songs, a pointless number unless you are counting off weeks of the year. Or cards in a deck, I suppose, but there was no connection there. The categories included: She Hates Me, I Hate Her; I Had No Idea That Song Was So Morbid; I Mope, Therefore I Am; I'm Trying To Be Profound And Touching, But I Really Suck At It, and the title group, I Hate Myself And Want To Die. Among others. He lists the song under each category, and then dissects it: he describes the song, both music and lyric; gives its history, as much as is relevant or interesting (read: depressing), and then explains why this song specifically is depressing.

It's not bad. Some of his choices are right on the money -- "Strange Fruit" by Billie Holiday, "Comfortably Numb" by Pink Floyd, and the Mighty Trio: Celine Dion's "All By Myself," Mariah Carey's "Without You," and Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You." He declares the most depressing song ever made to be "The Christmas Shoes" by Newsong, and that is one thousand percent accurate. The only problem is that he is a bit too much of a music snob, and so is too forgiving of artists that he thinks are good musicians, and too harsh on artists he doesn't like -- he chose "One," by Metallica, which is definitely depressing (especially including the video, a large part of why he picked it), but the song doesn't fit his criteria -- he just doesn't like Metallica's music very much. Same goes for Nine Inch Nails's "Hurt," which he thinks is wonderful in the remade version by Johnny Cash, but horrid in Trent Reznor's original -- and I thought the opposite. His criticism gets a bit too snippy, even caustic and mean at times, and that was sometimes troubling. He did make an odd, and maybe intentionally humbling, choice to keep in the chapter on the song "Brick," by the Ben Folds Five, even after he found out that he had misinterpreted the song; he added some editorial comments pointing out where he had later realized he sounded like an idiot, and kept the chapter in the book. Which was interesting, but a little odd to read.

The biggest problem with the writing was simply that he ran out of ways to say the song was really, really depressing, and yet he felt the need to say it about every one, in the explanation of why the song is depressing. He went the same route almost every time, saying that the song was so depressing it made you want to kill yourself in some terrible painful way -- it felt like someone was "peeling the skin off your skull with a sardine key," for instance. It got very, very tired.

Thoughts:
In some ways it was interesting, but it was too one-dimensional and there were too many depressing songs. The book would have been better if he had included horrifying songs, or sad songs (He did make a nice distinction between sad and depressing, but then I disagreed with his example), or even happy songs. Or if it had been, say, the 26 most depressing songs you've ever heard.


**Bloody Jack by L.A. Meyer (77) 12/30

Pick:
Toni found this one in the St. Helens Bookshop and said we should buy it; then she read it first, and insisted I should read it now, instead of something less full of pirate-y goodness. And by gum, she was right.

Story:
This is the tale of Mary "Jacky" Faber, a poor lost orphan girl from the streets of London who found her way onto a British Navy ship under pretense of boyhood, and genuine ability to read --earning her a spot as ship's boy and assistant to the clerk and shipboard tutor. She gains the trust and friendship of her fellow ship's boys, and learns to love the sea and her ship as they sail the Atlantic hunting pirates.

This is a hell of an adventure story. The twist of Mary's concealed gender doesn't dominate the story; much more important and moving was her time as a starving orphan, following the death of her entire family in one of the plagues that constantly sweep London during the 18th century, when the book is set. But the fact that Mary is a girl does add suspense, and some real depth to her character. The depiction of shipboard life is interesting, historically accurate and informative as far as I can tell, and the story drew me in and kept me rolling along. Definitely recommend this, especially to adventurous young women.

Thoughts:
Hey, I read it in a day, and I'm going to be buying the rest of the series. Part of me wishes that Mary was a pirate, but this works very nicely, anyway.


**Blood Rites: Book Six of the Dresden Files by Jim Butcher (78! Woot!) 12/31

Pick:
I love Dresden, so it seemed a good way to end the year. Plus I was pretty sure I could burn through the book in less than 24 hours and get it on my 2009 list.

Story:
While this one is clever, in the connection between the White Court and the porn industry, it really isn't one of my favorites. It brings some great characters sharply to life: I really like Thomas's place in this series, and this is the book where he steps up and becomes an important character; I think Kincaid is a fascinating shades-of-gray hero/villain; and this is where Harry meets Mouse -- and who doesn't love Mouse?

The most interesting part of the story line -- apart from Thomas and Harry, of course -- is what Harry finds out about Ebenezar McCoy. I love how Harry grows more into the shades of gray in this series, and then (though I haven't read the most recent book and the series isn't over yet) seems to come out the other side with an even stronger sense of morality, of right and wrong, and this revelation is a big part of that journey. I think it's cool.

Thoughts:
At least I was write in my reasons for picking it. And I do like what happens to Thomas's father, Lord Raith. The big twerp.

The main thing is, this finishes a year in books -- a year that featured a pair of collapses, first of our computer, and then of my book shelf. The second one, funnily enough, had the bigger impact for me, I think. Though I am still trying to recover from the loss of my writing, so maybe they both mattered.

At any rate, this year's finished. On to the next!


The Wrap Up:

You know, overall this seemed like a pretty mediocre year for reading. There were some high points, but between the twin catastrophes that screwed this list up -- the collapse of our computer and my book shelf -- and the Amazon Vine program, which has certainly expanded my reading horizons and (one hopes) is doing good things for my career, but which also puts a fair number of cruddyish books in my hands, there seem like a lot of books that I just wasn't that excited about. Maybe it wasn't my fault that my reading slowed down towards the end of the year, there.

Best Book of the Year:
The Gathering Storm, Book Twelve of the Wheel of Time. Fool was great, too, as was Travels With Charley and The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time and A Wrinkle in Time. But it's all about WoT.

Worst Book That I Finished:
Probably Magician's Apprentice. Maybe School of Fear.

Worst Book That I Didn't Finish:
Oh, that would probably be The Company of Dogs. Though I tried to read a number of massive tomes/weighty authoring, between Genji, Strange/Norrell, and The Darkness That Comes Before.

Book That Was Most Fun To Make Fun Of:
Magician's Apprentice

Most Surprisingly Enjoyable Book:
Actually reading The Pirate Primer, or The Cleft And Other Tales

Most Inspiring Book:
Travels With Charley

Most Demoralizing Book:
The Death of Common Sense

Book That Made Me Laugh The Most:
Fool

Saddest Book:
Dry

Best Vine book:
The Magicians